Thou hast offended the divine Jobs, the creator and destroyer of platforms.
God tested an earlier version of Steve Jobs, named Job. Jobs' revenge was to grant the angel Satan a gig at Microsoft. Jobs has continued to contract with him via marketing.
For your wantcrimes of daring to want features Jobs has decided you don't really need, he will OS X-communicate you by taking away your Apple products. So you'd better Think Different than question his divine wisdom about:
- wanting a button to eject a disc
- wanting to use Flash
- wanting to use a phone network that actually, you know, connects phones
- want to use an iPhone to see breasts
- wanting to use any browser besides Safari
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